When I Remember

When I woke up this morning, I saw something weird. God gave me a vision of a tomb (kuburan). I wondered what was it about.

Then I opened my Bible and started reading 3 passages as usual (it was Matthew 26-28’s turn this morning). As I read the passages, I noticed it was about Jesus’ death and His resurrection. It was about the cross and the empty tomb!

Again and again God spoke to me. And I know that it is not because I am a deserving person. I’m no “holy-religious” guy, I made terrible mistakes in my life. As I am writing this now, my tears almost fall as I know how undeserving I am, yet how much He loves me.

I have not understood why these passages rhymes in my heart till tonight. Tonight, something in me wanted to “go back” to my old life. “Cm’mon Dave, sin feels good. Cm’mon, no one will know. Cm’mon.”

I was so troubled by these temptations, but God gave me a song from His heart, a song that reminded me of what I read this morning:

When I remember that He died for me,
I’ll never go back anymore, Hallelujah
When I remember that He died for me,
I’ll never go back anymore.

No no never never uh uh uh,
I’ll never go back anymore, Hallelujah
No no never never uh uh uh,
I’ll never go back anymore.

When I remember that He rose again,
I’ll never go back anymore, Hallelujah
When I remember that He rose again,
I’ll never go back anymore,

No no never never uh uh uh,
I’ll never go back anymore, Hallelujah
No no never never uh uh uh,
I’ll never go back anymore.

Simon Peter, God’s beloved disciple, went back to be a fisherman when he knew that His Master has died. But he didn’t realized that his Master’s death was for him to be saved. And his Master’s resurrection is to defeat the power of sin and its sting (death).

Some times later, the same Peter went to the cross just as his Master did, but he never went back. No, not anymore! He remembered that his Master died for him. That his Master rose for him too. Peter never went back.

Whatever your problem, Jesus loves you. He died for you. He rose for you. There is a calling I heard, someone calls you. Someone knocks on your door. Will you open it?

My God is a true lover.

Beloved.. when you follow Jesus, He will give you the strength to keep carrying on. To keep following Him, no matter how big your problem is.

Let’s pray this prayer: “Jesus, when I remember that You died for me, I’ll never go back anymore.”

Nice music: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/77767867/When%20I%20remember%20that%20He%20died%20for%20me.mp3

Glory to God

lyrics and music from: http://www.hymnalaccompanist.com/hios/hos58.html
picture from: http://www.officialpsds.com/images/thumbs/Graveyard-Tomb-psd16965.png 

Why Always Me?

Have you ever been so amazed?

The president passed your house, all of his bodyguards were there. Many limousines were there and no one knew in which limousine was the president. Then one limousine stopped, the door was opened. The crowd was silenced. A man on a black suite came out, walked on your backyard, and knocked on your door. You thought it was the pizza guy, but suddenly you realised that a pizza guy won’t wear a suite and his vehicle was no way a limousine. Suddenly, you recognised the face you often saw at your TV and newspapers was smiling at you. It was the president knocking on your very own door. You gave him your life-time-most-awkward smile and you tried to said hello. But your tongue won’t cooperate, you look like an Indonesian baby trying to say “Refrigerator”. He then started a conversation: “How are you? What’s your name? If you don’t mind, I need to use your toilet.”

That’s what I call surprise!

But what if, what if someone much more than your president knock on your door. Someone who leads not only a nation, but owns all nations and angels. He made the universe, the star, the moon. And moreover, he made you! More-more-moreover, He wants to speak with you!

You may say, the first story is impossible, the latter is the grandmother of impossible.

Well okay, but that grandmother wants to tell you a true story. Want to hear?

About 1 hour ago, I was praying before I read my bible. Something struck me, saying in my heart: “Dave, the others will fall, but not you.” I don’t know how to respond. What’s this? But another voice in my heart was against it. It was a prayer saying “Lord, but I pray. I pray for those who fall. I pray for those who do evil. I pray for them. For I know you. You are a good Father who sends rain both to the good and to the evil.”

Actually, I never understood the conversation. What was it meant?

But soon after that, I opened my bible, I continued my reading from the new testament. It was now Matthew 5’s turn as the last time I read was Matthew 4. I reached the 44th verse and I read it till verse 45. It says “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you,” that you may be sons of your Father in heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.”

Magical. Illogical. Unbelievable. So.. so.. God.

Maybe this story seems unbelievable, but why would I lie? (it’s almost midnight here and writing this for a fantasy seems to be a bit weird even for me). God really talks. I don’t know the method. I don’t know when. I just know. I want to talk with Him. I want to hear Him. I think that is enough requirement. Do you want to talk with Him?

Balotelli said “Why always me?” Well maybe he’s right, why do people focus on a single player, when there are 22 on the pitch and millions outside.

 

God, however, is not like football supporters, “He sends rain on the just and on the unjust.” He loves me and you, no matter how bad we are and what past mistakes we made. He wants to talk with US! Not only you and not only me. US! It’s always US!

Love never fails. I am 100% sure (if 100 is the maximum value of sureness). I am 100% sure, that He knows you too. That He loves you too. That He talks to you through this message or (if not), through millions of ways He has in mind, just to get your attention (sun or rain or anything that makes you smile today). For all He wants is you and me to love Him back just as He loves US. Want to be God’s chatting friend? Ask Him, He’s longing for you.

Amen.

The brand of a pen is not written in the bibliography it is just the author’s name.
OUR Dad deserves all the glory.

pics taken from https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlAdUOUIlABkdFcZQZM7kbE3TI5todysMV9w_sExZ8JoOtcw85PraLTsALL0I2kGY928xeySMa7IuUr7_peju3rc19eklZsRvSjg5oAb_S8TvtuxVXIEYKr3Rop-k4E4PoaS-ZmbXy4X0z/s1600/Balotelli-Why-Always-Me-500x293.jpg

a song in the morning, when the fat lamb woke up

 

Engkau Gembala yang baik, Kau menuntun hidupku,
dan bawaku ke air tenang, menyegarkan jiwaku.
Sekalipun kuberjalan dalam lembah kekelaman,
Tak akan gentar kumelangkah sbab Engkau besertaku.

pics from http://free.clipartof.com/54-Free-Cartoon-Sheep-Clipart-Illustration.jpg

Today

Wake up this morning, something struck my mind.

Why am I here? Why am I praying? Don’t I remember the sin I’ve done? That secret stuff I’ve did that broke my Father’s heart?

The past, Dave. The past! What about the past? What about your failure? Have you forgotten your dark past? Why are you here?

Those thoughts discouraged me I must confess. I wanted to pray. I wanted to call my Dad. But what if,, what if He doesn’t want me anymore?

Then God gave me a vision. I saw a man. He was in a pit, was so desperate to go out. Then a rope came, he grabbed it. The vision ended.

What was this vision suppose to mean?

Why did he give me the vision?

I then opened my bible and His words came up from the book of revelation. “Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first.” (Rev 2:5a).

How far I have fallen! Like that man have fallen in the deep pit. But that was his past. God gave him a “rope” of repentance. God gave him a “grip” of grace as His hands are strong enough to pull the man up.

The bible said: “The Lord makes firm the steps of the one who delights in him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand” (Psa 37:23-24). The man may stumble, but he will not fall. Is it because of his strength? No, because God upholds him with His hand.

How far have you fallen? Was it so deep? Too deep? God’s love is even deeper. “As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” (Psa 103:12). “As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear Him.” (Psa 103:13). That 10 meter pit was nothing compared to the distance of east to west. That 10 meter pit was nothing compared to our Father’s immeasurable compassion.

No matter how far you have fallen, grab that rope! Accept His love and repent! God will give something precious to you. As a father walks with his son, God will walk with you to do “something beautiful  in His mind”.

Throw away those rubbish past newspapers! The newspaper of love starts today! Its headline news is entitled “Hello son! Dad loves you!”

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. (Lamentations 3:22-23)

The brand of a pen is not written in the bibliography, it is the writer’s name.

pics taken from https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxGsk8NUfeXdexdKQI38TCPMyH3XgMyrZxqrS_GdlHbvZXSZqbuoRXaen3BHFcM2fcpPJXdhUcufM1xQyYr6jyh6xdQPSZB_oSSvp560kUVfdJ7OaPdZzQlBHrg2bf1lRVkaX9QOdP_UI/s400/End+of+my+rope.jpg

How this day Started and Ended

I started the day by calling my Dad, my Lover. He told me to sing a song called: “Besar AnugerahMu” (Great is you Grace). I sang it, I didn’t know why I should sing it though.

Till the afternoon I thought about a lot of things and worried too much about my future, the evil then started to bring me back to my dark past. Then my little sister came, we spoke about a lot of things (from Frog to Rendang <Indonesian food> and many more). God sent her to cheer me and bless me.

But still some worries appeared in my head. Till God intervened. Through a sermon, He spoke about grace.

He told me that “to be more than a conqueror” means living in grace and not my own power. That God had already done it and now I just need to calm down, to be still, to rest. He told me that what makes me a winner is the Holy Spirit and NOT my strength. He told me that “hardships and challenges” and my “distrust in my own strength” is a beginning for His grace to flow, as I can fully dependent on His grace when I distrust my self-effort. He answered all my worries, all my guilt, all my desperation and disbelief with one single word: GRACE.

His grace makes me strong, grow, and abundant. His grace makes me, an undeserving man, to be worthy to enjoy ALL of His blessings. His Grace.

And now it’s time to sleep and close the day. A song I sang in the morning I sang again. It filled my heart to close the day. “Besar Anugerahmu. Berlimpah kasih-Mu. Semakin hari, smakin bertambah. Besar anugrah-Mu.” Now I know why God told me to sang this song. Because His grace is great and it is all I need to be victorious.

Amen.

Glory to God.

Coklat Stroberi

BLOGsy! How are you? hehe. Sekian lama kau tak kutulis. Rindu kali aku padamu. Cuppp cupp. Jangan sedih ya. Jariku begitu bersemangat meloncat-loncat diatas keyboard ini, sambil memandangi dirimu. Cuit cuit! Auu auu! Guk guk guk! hehehe. O BLOGsy, siapkah kau kutulis?

Anyway, judul tulisan kali ini adalah Coklat Stroberi. Maksdudnya apa nih? Balotelli (Coklat) vs David Silva (Stroberi)? Hmm,, kurang tepat. Lalu? Lalu lintas kalee. Haha.

Singkat cerita, beberapa hari yang lalu aku pindah ke rumah orang Skotlandia. Scottish are nice people you know! Walo kadang aku nggak ngerti mereka ngomong apa. Tapi nggak apa2, kan tinggal ngangguk2 sambil senyum kalo ga ngerti. Wkwkwk.

Sangking baiknya mreka, aku jadi menggendut (walo tetap G*nteng), soalnya bayangin aja ya. (mari membayangkan ….). Bayangin aja ya! Roti, susu, makan malem (biasanya steak, kentang, daging cincang) disediain semua coba! Jangan salahkan aku atas semua kegendutan ini. Hehe.

Beberapa hari kemudian, keluargaku menelepon lewat Skype dan mamaku langsung mengomentari wajah yang agak sedikit lebih tembem ini (agak + sedikit loh ya). Lalu apa komentarnya? “Es krim juga disediain, nak?” Emangnya restoran! Hahaha. Kami semua menertawakan pertanyaan itu. Capek deh mosok iya udah dikasi roti, daging, susu, dikasih es krim juga? Seselesai telepon, aku makan malam bersama keluarga Scottish ini. Kau tahu apa yang mereka sediakan untuk menutup makan malam?

ES KRIM Coklat Stroberi!

Hohoho, sekarang siapa yang tertawa?

Aku merenungkan akan sebuah tawa. Sarah yang sudah nenek2 tertawa ketika diberitahukan kalau dia akan mempunyai seorang anak. “Hahahahhaha, mosok iya sichh??? Hehehehehe. Masaa sicchhh?”
–lebay mode: OFF-

Beberapa hari yang lalu akupun banyak tertawa. Biasanyakan orang bertobat nangis2 sambil maju altar call, tapi beberapa hari yg lalu aku minta sm Tuhan supaya untuk kasusku agak beda: “kalau boleh, buatlah aku bertobat sambil tertawa”. Kini aku sadar permintaan itu ga main2 didengarNya.

Ketika Ia menjanjikan sesuatu yang tidak mungkin bagi kita, kadang kita tertawa. Kita pikir itu hanyalah sebuah lelucon. Hanyalah sebuah imajinasi. Padahal sebenarnya Dia lagi serius, kitanya aja yang ga nyambung.

Hehe. Tertawalah kalau kau tak tahan mendengarkan ketidakmungkinan itu. Tapi pada akhirnya kau akan dibuat-Nya takjub.

Lagu ini indah dan benar sekali:

Kau sungguh indah tiada taranya,
sungguh menakjubkan.
Sungguh ajaib ‘tuk dimengerti.
Lebih dari s’mua yang ada.
HikmatMu tiada terselami
KasihMu dalam tak terduga.

Kau sungguh indah tiada taranya
Mulia dan berkuasa

Kukagum hormat akan Engkau
Kukagum hormat akan Engkau

Kau Allah yang layak dipuji
Kukagum akan Engkau

Lalu berfirmanlah TUHAN kepada Abraham: "Mengapakah Sara tertawa dan berkata: Sungguhkah aku akan melahirkan anak, sedangkan aku telah tua? Adakah sesuatu apapun yang mustahil untuk TUHAN? Pada waktu yang telah ditetapkan itu, tahun depan, Aku akan kembali mendapatkan engkau, pada waktu itulah Sara mempunyai seorang anak laki-laki. ^{(Kej 18:13-14)}

GOD is ABLE to DO AnyThiNG. Ask and see!

Praise be to God!

Amen.